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in Working Mom

Returning to Work After Baby Is Hard

Today marks my return to work full time postpartum and it’s hard.  Hard because I love my children.  Hard because I’m most appreciated at home.  Hard because I’m not the same woman as I was before having my second baby.  Hard because I’m paying someone to watch by children learn, grow, and thrive while I work.  Hard because I love helping college students to learn, grow, and thrive.  Hard because I don’t always know if I’m doing the right thing.  Hard because I feel like both my children and I lose by me going back to work.  Hard because I know my kids will be stronger by having a working mom.  Hard because I’d rather breastfeed my son than pump.  Hard because I wish I could stay home with my kids and still provide for my family monetarily.  Hard because I love working full time outside of the house and being a mom.  Hard because I want both worlds.

Kinnick
Today Kinnick is 6 months old and I am so incredibly grateful.  Grateful for both of my children, my second pregnancy, Kinnick’s delivery, my recovery postpartum, the 6 weeks of maternity leave my work provides, and the vacation hours saved to be with Kinnick longer while on FMLA.

Returning to work after having a baby is hard, and although it will always be hard, day 1 is always tough. Well, honestly, day 2 is the toughest! While I’ve been back at work part time since 6 weeks postpartum, having these past 4 months to work and care for my son has been such a blessing.  Being able to see him grow and change has been incredible and I will really miss my days with him.

These feelings are all too familiar and I’m sure every working mom shares similar emotions. For me, it’s such a mixed bag because I absolutely love my career and the work I am able to do while my children are in school.  On the other hand, it’s hard not to feel like I’m missing out on their most precious days.

Kinnick
I will miss being with this sweet boy, just as much as I miss spending my days with Magnolia, but I am so thankful for the people who teach my kids and love them for me while I work. Being a working mom is a roller coaster of emotions, but what I’ve learned is that motherhood is a roller coaster of emotions. Both are hard!

Here’s to day 1… and to day 2! May the traffic Gods be in my favor so that I can pick up my kiddos as early as possible after work.

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I'm Ashley, a full-time working mom who lives in the Washington, DC area. Balancing Today is all about learning to balance family, work, wellness, and most of all, life's simple joys! Read More!

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