I woke up this morning feeling like I’ve put on 10 pounds overnight. My body feels heavy and I’m mentally discouraged. Being nominated by Fitness Magazine for the “Best Weight Loss Blog” has been awesome, but at the same time discouraging. I wish I was a blogger who could say, “I lost 100 pounds and am at my goal weight”. The truth is, I’m not there. I started this journey weighing 261 pounds. I couldn’t run, couldn’t make it through a spin class, and my motivation to eat healthy was close to nothing. I wanted it in my head, but my actions did not follow.
From November 2006-August 2007 I had lost 54 pounds! I felt great but became comfortable with where I was at. I honestly think I was scared to lose more weight. I felt thin and justified staying where I was at.
As I’ve shared in My Journey, 2007-2009 were tough years for me. Here I stand, almost 5 years since losing 54 pounds and I’ve gained 20 pounds back. On the flip side, I’ve run multiple races (a half marathon, 15K, 10K, 5 miler, and 5K), I take spin classes 2-3 times a week, and have more endurance than I’ve ever had before. So what’s my deal? Why am I having a fat day? Why am I not losing weight?
I feel like I have pieces of the puzzle, but they’re just not all coming together. Let’s take yesterday for example…
- Breakfast- banana and cherry smoothie with 1 scoop of protein powder and everything bagel (dry)
- Lunch- 2.5 cups of spinach, light Caesar dressing, and croutons
- Snacks- 1 fruit leather and 2 cups of tomato soup
- Dinner- WAY too much pasta (high fiber pasta with Parmesan cheese, seasoning, and olive oil)
- Post Dinner Snack- 1 cup of honey bunches of oats cereal and vanilla soy milk
I started out the day with my head of straight. I made a smoothie for breakfast and packed my lunch. Knowing the smoothie wouldn’t tie me over, I had a bagel around 10:30AM. My lunch was very tasty, but a spinach salad with no protein wasn’t very smart. Around 3PM I had the soup and the fruit leather. By the time I got home from work last night, I was super hungry and had no motivation to workout. I decided to roast asparagus and have some pasta on the side. Well, I made way too much pasta but since it was ready before the asparagus I just started eating dinner. After having 1 bowl, I went back and finished the rest of the pasta instead of waiting for the asparagus. My plan to have veggies with a side of pasta turned into 2 bowls of pasta and no veggies. To top it all off, I wanted something sweet to eat so 2 hours later I had a small bowl of cereal. WHY? I wasn’t even hungry.
I woke up this morning feeling frustrated and discouraged. Instead of getting too down on myself, I made a smoothie, put on my workout clothes, and headed into work early to get a workout in before my work meeting. I got into work around 8:15AM only to learn that the gym doesn’t open until 9AM because of spring break. AHHH! I was so frustrated. I totally could have gone outside for a run but I feared not having enough time to shower before my meeting. Instead I showered and heading into the office.
So what can I do? How can I turn things around? I would REALLY love to be back at 208 by my wedding but I also know I have to be realistic. My first wedding dress fitting is in 5 weeks, so even if I lost 2 pounds each week, that’d bring me down to 218 pounds. So what can I do to lose 2 pounds each week?
- Order wisely at lunch today with Becky
- Exercise this afternoon with Neal
- Portion out my dinner, eating more veggies than carbs or protein (tonight Neal and I have a special date night dinner planned)
- Drink lots of water
- Follow through with my plans! I’m doing a great job planning, but I’ve got to stick to it
- Be ok with being hungry
- Use my wedding as motivation
- Drink lots of water each day!
- Eat veggies and fruit first
- Enjoy my workouts, getting a workout in each day!
I want this so bad… but I’ve got to want it enough to not allow laziness or food obsessions to get in the way. I’ve got to workout each day and I’ve got to be wise with what I eat. Easier said that done, but I know I can do this!! I want this again!